Dear Blog,

It's been a long time. It is time to blow the dust off this old blog and revive it with some fresh thought and insight.

I have been going through a lot of life changes recently. I just finished the hardest semester of my life, I am about to earn an associates degree, I have made a lot of new friends, and most of these new friends come from The Salvation Army church.

The Salvation Army Church is what I kind of what to blog about today. Not really the church itself and their beliefs and whatnot, but I want to share with you the message this last Sunday. Let me preface it with this. It has been a LONG TIME since I have really remembered a sermon, taken it to heart, and really applied to my everyday life.

So what was the message?

The message was illustrated with a snowglobe. A snowglobe a little world incapusulated in a glass globe filled with water and glitter. This globe she said represented each of us and our own little worlds we live in. The glitter that comes up when shaking it represents stirring emotions such as frustration, anxiety, anger, etc. These emotions generally happen because either myself or someone other than God is holding my precious snow globe life. I am letting them or myself shake things up instead of taking my world and putting in the hands of the one who created it.

This illustration was and is so powerful in my life. I find myself stopping myself throughout this week already and saying "who is shaking up my snow globe?" I find that if nothing else it has made me more aware. Trust is something I am working on, but unfortunately I am a slow work in progress.

The other thing that was beautiful is that when I went and talked to Rachel after church she told me that she had gotten a word from the spirit about me during the message. She shared that with me and prayed over me.

Guys, I am telling you it has been a lonnnggg time. Way too long actually since I have really felt alive in the Lord and Sunday was for the first time in a LONG time refreshing.

So I am just praising God for what he is doing in my life right now. I know He has big plans for me and I can't wait for Him to reveal them to me in His timing :)

bloom where you are planted...

"Bloom where you are planted" I can't tell you how many times I have heard that phrase recently...and it must be a God thing. It reminds me of 1 Corinthians 7:20 where Paul says: " Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called".

  Friends to tell you the truth I have been seeing so much change around me...in my life but mostly in my friends and I sometimes think that my life could be better or fuller if similar changes were to happen to me...I get overwhelmed as friendships change and go away. I have become depressed and a bit withdrawn. But, just tonight the Lord is working on my heart...and believe me when I tell you that I have felt a spiritual battle in my soul!

  Things may be changing, friendships come and go, but God stays forever and He is enough for me to be content. He is enough to keep me going. I don't need to change the way everyone else is.

   I need to stay where I am and glorify the Lord there...moving out, a boyfriend, a new car, more money, etc. are nice but NONE compare to Jesus and my relationship with Him. I have to keep this in the forefront of my thoughts because if I don't the devil is going to do what he has been doing to me for the past few days...He is going to gradually drag me down until I get really depressed and miserable and he wants me to forget how wonderful a friend and savior I have! I am not going to let him! He is not allowed here anymore. 

So friends, bloom where you are. You don't have to fix everything before you start your service for the Lord. You don't have to be in an ideal place to be joyful in the Lord. God should be our joy. It should be in everything that we glorify Him!

.You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, whose thoughts are fixed on you.

Isaiah 26:3

Oops...

So we have talked about modesty here before and about how our clothes should be glorify to God. But I don't that anyone I have heard of....has said sometimes even when we are trying to please God with our clothes honest mistakes can happen.

Wednesday I was up at 6:30 in the dark stumbling around trying to get ready for my classes and I just pulled on some shorts and a T-shirt. (You should know I am a really modest person that didn't think she had any problem clothes in her wardrobe...) I honestly thought I was perfectly fine and that my clothes were fine and covered what they needed too. They were not...I made an honest mistake and wore it all day. I didn't notice it either until two guys hit on me and made comments about my body that made me very uncomfortable...

I was mortified I didn't want this to happen! I try to honor God in all my choices especially with my clothes and my body...I even had lunch with a Godly girlfriend...She may not have noticed but either way she didn't say anything...I had work out clothes in my car that were better I could have changed into if I had noticed or someone told me.

So here are lessons

• Sometimes even when we have the best intentions we make mistakes...not that we should dress immodestly and say it was a mistake. But it does happen.
• Girls,(and I say girls because guys its inappropriate for you to do so) if you notice a friend of yours that strives for modesty having a wardrobe malfunction let her know gently and talk about what you two can do to fix it...a jacket or hoodie can help with too tight pants with tying it around the waist or of course with a shirt problem. :)
• Guys, if your sister in Christ is having a problem with her wardrobe she might notice I know this is a tricky subject... I know guys I have known before if their sisters or another girl they trusted was around they alerted them to deal with it.
• Check in the mirror a couple times in the light after you stumble around the dark to get dressed! haha.
• Laugh at yourself and don't let the same mistake happen twice :) 

So I know this was really random but like I said this has happen to me recently and it was on my mind. If you can add to this I would love to hear it in the comments below!!

In progress...

Sanctification...to be set apart and to make holy and pure...that is what is on my mind.

I am so far from perfect...in fact I am pretty pathetic. Its just a fact. But you know what? I am a work in progress. I am in the process of sanctification and it is a process. Its a process filled with trials, sweet times of prayer,  and lots of lessons. Its a process of growing closer and more like God. Its not easy. Nothing worth it is ever easy though...

Yeah I guess that about all my thoughts for today...Sanctification its awesome. (yeah I am bad at blogging lately but I am trying! haha)

Times are changing...

I don't know why I didn't expect this...I kind of wish I would have braced myself more but life is changing faster than ever before. 2011 was a wild ride and this year is starting out that way as well. My friendships are ever evolving, changing, and bringing new friends in. I am now in college. I have a car. I am in the process of trying to get a job. Life is crazy busy and for the most part I love that....however, there are those moments where I just want to slow down and breathe again...Sometimes life lately doesn't even seem to allow that. During this overwhelming time of change and craziness my moments with God in prayer (even if while driving) are so much more precious! Not to mention important to my sanity.

Lately, I have been uber emotional and reflective. I have been thinking about how things used to be and how much they have changed. I have also been thanking God for the friends and family He has blessed me with. I sometimes do wonder how a lot of things would be if things were different...but then I remember that things are the way they are and I cannot change that....what I can do is trust in Christ alone.

We live in a crazy, busy, always changing world in which our only real constant and source of sanity can be Christ. Everything else changes, He does not, and will not. Thank God!

Writing a letter to my younger self...

This is a letter to my younger self and while highly personal I believe its more eloquent than one I have thought about putting on here before...you may comment if you would like...I would love to hear what your number one piece of advice would be if you wrote a letter to your younger self.




Dear younger self,
One day you will be 20 years old and still living at home. You will still be behind in school but it won't matter anymore because you will finally be in college. You will meet handsome guys and have crushes but you won't meet one yet  that you think you will marry. You will have your heart broken...but it won't be a huge crushing blow it will be more of a silent pain that the guy doesn't even know about because he doesn't know you care for him like that.But it will be ok because your still friends and you don't want that to change.

Be encouraged though! You will have great friends and a fairly great first semester in college (even though it has had its hardships). You are so blessed by the people you have in your life and you realize it more and more with each passing day, month, and year! Tip: You grow farther away from the people you are close to now and become siblings with some of the people you least expect.


You will still have a rough relationship with mom but you are learning to deal with it in a hopefully more Godly manner...Things are still hard with family sometimes but God is still in control.


You will one day finally be in college, have a car, and be alot more independent...I am there you made it...but it costs alot more than you thought it did and while well worth it...its a crazy life

The car was a hardship with alot of repairs and tears. Still needs a small repair but God did provide even though he probably provided a smaller blessing than He would have had you been more patient. Work on patience! lol

In college your first semester you will have some good professors and some not so good. You make some decent friends and its not so scary. Also you don't completely fail as you feared. I think you will make it through and be doubly excited for your second semester. :)

Overall life is ok. The same family, The absolute best of friends,  college, a car, and just a little heartache and hardship. You have built and are building alot of character still. The story isn't over...hopefully its just beginning.  I don't know about you then but me now can't wait to see what God writes next...hoping for a romance but you know what I will take adventure or whatever else God has lol.

Love,
Your current self :)

Trusting God and taking my own advice...

Today I had a friend crying and telling me that her and her boyfriend were doomed to break up...they hadn't talked all day today....no I am not joking that's what happened. They had talked every other day this week but today and she felt he didn't love her anymore.

Well I was trying to encourage her and be logical with her and we got on the topic of trusting God...she said she just couldn't trust God anymore...she said she prayed and prayed and she just couldn't do it.

You know I reminded her and myself that trusting in God is alot easier than worrying over stuff. I mean I really need to take my own advice and remember that God is God and I am not. God is in control of all things and I am not. God has a plan for me and it is good. God loves me more than I could ever love Him in return. God's timing is not my timing but its perfect timing. So why is it that I don't trust in Him all the time? I have no reason not to trust.

The reason sadly though is that we seem to sometimes forget who our God is when we get so wrapped up in our petty problems. We get so worked up over minuscule stuff and we start believing the lie "God can't help me now" or "Why did  I ever trust God? I still have problems...it did me no good"

Precious, Beloved ones!! These are some lies we need to banish... I don't know maybe some of you don't have trust issues...if you don't consider yourself highly blessed. But for those like me, you need to boot these lies to the curb! You need to put on your armor, send up a prayer, and look out for the devil every morning!


We can't forget who our God is...when we forget we stop trusting, You don't trust a stranger very easily do you? That is they way we have been conditioned since we were young. But you do trust someone you live with, love, and talk to everyday right? Are you getting my point?
I know this post is a little choppy and maybe it makes no sense...I am tired...but I just had to get this out before I go to sleep tonight...

More than conquerors

More Than Conquerors

 ³¹ What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? ³³ Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. ³⁴ Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. ³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ³⁶ As it is written:

 “For your sake we face death all day long;
   we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”

  
³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸ For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹ neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:31-39



I love this passage...its one of my all time favorites...Just had to share it and say...
ISN'T OUR GOD JUST THE ABSOLUTE BEST!?!

So we meet again...blog

sorry for not updating regularly anymore...college has taken most if not all my time away lately....I have been  going through so much change and busyness latley that its been hard to keep up with myself let alone a blog lol.

In my last post I talked about how hard it is to be in such a secular school without a good ministry...that's no different...however at church on wednesday night we are starting a new series which really excites me. Its by focus on the family, its a video series, and its called "does God exist" its basically a college world view class. It helps you understand your faith and the faith of others better.Its helps so you are more well equipped to know what you believe and ready to give an answer when someone asks a question about the Lord. I feel its just what I need midway through my week to keep me going! Praise God! Plus I am now going to start listening to sermons on tape ( yeah those old things called cassette tapes that play in my old 93 escort!) on the way to and from school for even more nourishment. I feel as though God is answering my prayers and recent hunger pains.=D


Oh and thanks to those of you who have prayed for what I mentioned in the last post! Keep it up!

Truth be told...

Lately I have been an sort of an emotional wreck...a small wreck...granted I am not going crazy  or suicidal or anything but life has been kinda rough.

I am struggling with fears and doubts starting college in 11 days...yep that's right I am counting them down! lol. I know that fear and doubts are normal in new situations but I still can't really shake them. You know? I know that God has a plan for me (Jer.29:11) but its kinda hard to remember that sometimes.

I am struggling with finances and getting a job...I think I have a good job opportunity coming up soon but I am not counting my chicks before they hatch! haha. So yeah...again though He is Jehovah Jireh, God my provider. Again though it seems remembering these things when I get in a state of worry and anxiety is the hard part.

Another thing I struggle with is just seeing all my friends going out on dates and having relationships and I am in the same old rut...alone. I know that I am not truly alone and God is there...but sometimes my heart still aches. Its a real trial sometimes...one I feel like I have dealt with many times before but I really think it gets harder as you get older. I could be wrong but yeah...trying not to dwell on it and remember that I am more available to God and His calling in my singleness =)



So yeah I know this was not the happiest blog ever...ok it stunk...but it is the truth and sometimes life is not fun. lol.

Are you acting like one of the family?

I got back from working a couple weeks at camp a few days ago. I have been very tired and still reeling from a really unusually crazy week at camp. I have been working on scholarship stuff, resting, and not doing much of anything.


Now my mom and dad know I am tired but soon they became tired of just seeing me not doing anything. Dad asked me to really start acting like one of the family again and pitch in....part of me was like "well gee thanks I am not part of the family because I haven't done many chores" and actually admittedly I did say something along those lines (Hey, I am not perfect and figure I should be honest here) But what my dad said reminded me of God and what He thinks of His servants. Here is something along the lines of what my dad said " Of course you are a part of this family whether you do chores or not but everyone pitches in around here and does there part. That is what makes us a family. I give you a break when you are tired but now that you are recovered its time to work again." 
 
This whole conversation though it was not fun to have definitely got me thinking about my relationship with God as well as with my family. It begs the question in my mind "Am I acting like one of the family?" I know I am in God's family. I know I am His daughter. But do I act like it? Am I obedient? Am I serving God as I should and how He wants me too? Or am I simply sitting here in the family but not pitching in?

Its food for thought.

Both the one who makes people holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers and sisters.Hebrews 2:11